I'm titling this a "review" because it's not really a proper review at all. I've never liked Muse; I didn't like them before I listened to them, and I certainly don't like them after giving them a try. And I will go through all the reasons I don't like them in this "review". So if you want a "I <3 Muse" blog post, you probably don't want to read this. If you do, however, want to read some guy tearing Muse apart, then this should be fine. Enjoy.
Absolution
This was the first Muse album I tried, and I got to song 4 before I had to give up. Because it sucked that bad. And this was supposed to be a good one, because "Hysteria" was on here, and that was supposed to be a good song (it's not).
01 Intro: This 22 second long piece of crap sounds like some dude smacking his hands repeatedly on a desk, while some other dude yells military-sounding commands at the end.
02 Apocalypse Please: And then, the Intro doesn't even lead into this properly. What a waste of 22 seconds. Christ, this dude's voice annoys me. He could be singing Slayer and I'd still want to shoot myself. He has this very annoying habit of stretching pretty much everything he sings out obnoxiously long (very apparent in "this is the eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeend, this iiiiiiiiiiiiis theeeee eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeend." And that apparently constitutes a chorus. My God, even him just going "Ooooooohh" manages to annoy me to no end. I'm sure some people will say his voice is deep and emotional, but no, it's just a really bad voice. This song could very easily be just the first minute copied and pasted three times. After the chorus, it repeats the exact same thing that was before the chorus, complete with the "Ooooh"'s. Terrible.
03 Time Is Running Out: This was another thing I noticed about Muse: they have a terrible habit of just putting a VERY annoying buzzing sound behind everything to make up for not having any instruments. Seriously, this song had 42 seconds of buzzing in the background. And there he goes again, stretching eeeeevery wooooord oooouuutt in the chorus. Oh and, the pre-chorus. "Apocalypse Please" went on and on about it being the end of the world, but they're only just now saying that time is running out? I notice a distinct problem with this album. OTHER than the fact it's complete shit I mean. Again, even the "OOooh ooohh ooh yeahyeahyeahyeah" SUCKS.
04 Sing For Absolution: This was as far as I could get the first time I listened to this album. Will I get further this time? Probably not. I've noticed that the singer's voice is annoying no matter what key he's singing in. Be it high, low, whiny, awful, he sucks. Oh God, now I remember why I stopped with this song. "Siiiing foooor Absoluuuuuuuuuuuuutiooon." Dragging every damn word out. ORIGINALITY , GUYS. COME ON. Yep, screw this. I'm done with this album. Oh I suppose I should review "Hysteria" as well.
08 Hysteria: This is supposed to be their best song. Wow. Obnoxious buzzing throughout pretty much the whole damn thing? Check. Heavily, heavily edited guitars, made to sound like more buzzing? Check. Edited vocals to make them sound, amazingly, like it's being sung into a bumblebee? Also check. A better band name would be BEEmuse. Ha! Get it? ...screw Muse.
The Resistance
01 Uprising: Now even I recognised this song. I think it's a pretty well-known one. But again, that won't stop it from being brought down by a terrible album. The first thing that's noticeable is that the singer's made some effort to have as clean vocals as he could, which is definitely a step up from "Absolution". But again, there's his really annoying habit of drawing out every single word. And again, the guitars are all edited to sound like annoying buzzing. Seriously, where the hell is the appeal in that? I especially hate the falsetto "So come on!" parts of this song. The clapping also gets very annoying by the way.
02 Resistance: This song begins with what sounds like a washer going on in the background that slowly gets louder. Then some dramatic music, drums, and piano. Not terrible so far! ...and then the singing starts. Seeming to pride himself on breaking his voice across different levels, the singer utilises his typical vocal talents. There is one thing I can say about this album: it's definitely better than Absolution. But then again, a beaver farting into a microphone probably would be better than that. Actually, I'll say this: the pre-chorus is pretty good. The "it could be wrong, could be wrong" part is not bad. But then the chorus ruins it with the typical dragging out all the words.
03 Undisclosed Desires: This is obviously a poorly disguised pop/rap song. It has the awful bass sound in the background that's not even made by the drummer. Actually, I'm not even sure there's a drummer there. And the trademark buzzing is there, ever present throughout all of the chorus! And that synth line is so annoying. But seriously, why would you want a buzzing sound over EVERYTHING? "Hey Mr. Label Boss guy, don't you think someone should take that buzzing out of this album?" "Nonsense lad, kids these days LOVE buzzing sounds on their music!"
04 United States Of Eurasia: This is the song that did it for me on this album. I gave up after this one. Actually, not even after it: sometime during it. It starts off not bad, with just piano and some low singing. But the he goes on to saying one line while dragging it all out, and then repeating it while dragging different parts out. He does this 2 different times after a minute and a half. It almost sounds as if they're trying to emulate Queen at points, which is an offence to both myself and Queen. Nope, that's it. I. Hate. Muse.
No comments:
Post a Comment